You know those friends, the kind that you see from time to time to have fun, but never really get to know deeper than that. You could have met through common friends or you might have a history stretching back from your high school days, so you feel connected to them even if you don’t really consider them a close friend.
You think it’s no harm keeping them around, but it might be a lot of time wasted in the long run.
Adulthood Comes with Changes
Adulthood is not just you getting a job and paying the bills. Now, you also have less time to laze around or do as you please. You have a schedule, and you have responsibilities. Simple things like window replacement in your Utah home, which used to just happen in your childhood house whenever they were needed, now have to be scheduled. You have no parents to save you from home maintenance, and if you forget to call your Utah contractor, it will have very real consequences.
Sometimes, you may also need to prioritize one expense over the other — a task that can be frustrating when you’re running on a tight budget. There’s also your job situation, which may require that you put in overtime or work with people you don’t get along with. It’s part of the job, so you do your best to remain professional.
If you look at it like that, adulthood sounds like you don’t have control of everything in your life. However, you do have control over what you feel during each difficult situation. You can choose to be upset and cry in a corner, or you can steel yourself and get the job done. It can be taxing, though. Imagine not having control even when you’re with your “friends.”
Friends versus Half-friends
Adults need their friends. When you were a child, having a best friend meant being able to talk about secrets you felt embarrassed to tell your parents. There’s someone who’s ready to listen to you and will think of your best interests. As adults, you need friends to support you when you’re making tough decisions. You keep them around because they help you feel better when you’ve had a bad day. You know that if you need them, they will drop what they’re doing for you.
Half-friends, however, seems more like a flight risk or baggage than an actual friend. When you’re with them, they ask about your day not because they genuinely care, but because they want that out of the way so they can talk about themselves. Your mood doesn’t feel lifted after you’ve hung out with them; it may not feel worse either, so you don’t realize that the time spent was more like time wasted.
But it’s what it is. Among the things you have control over in your life, choosing the friends you spend time with is one of the most important. There’s emotional investment involved, which means something they say might affect your mood for a long time. If they don’t have anything good to add to your life, don’t let them be there just to add negative energy.
You invest time in the important people in your life. Given that you have limited time to spare, it would be best to use it on people who actually add value to your life.